The Scientist in the Manga
by Mr. Chaos
Summary: Mr. Chaos joins forces with Darkly Dreaming! Bones finds herself in a bizarre world, where women have huge breasts, men carry swords, the Jeffersonian is an airship, & Yugi runs a casino with Joey. Oh, & there is a murder to solve. Part of the ABCverse!
1. Chapter 1

Mr. Chaos' note: Blame Darkly Dreaming, aka Sarah. She posted on my Facebook a suggestion for a new crossover with Bones and Yu-Gi-Oh!. In truth, I think she was just desperate to get me to write something. The Boy in the Bot was put on hold as I made serious headway with my first mystery novel ("The Barefoot Witch", the first of the O'Reilly Brothers series, is half way finished!) and I for a while didn't know if I would be doing fan fiction other than finishing ELSEWHERE for quite some time, if ever.

And then she made her suggestion, something so strange and crazy that I should never have attempted it.

Well...I love a challenge.

Problem is, I am still writing a novel, and I have a full time job, having just gotten a promotion. I can't dedicate myself to writing as much as I once did. I would need help.

And Sarah, bless her, stepped up to the plate.

Let me say this: This story would not have happened without Sarah. Even if it is on my page, this is her story too. She came up with the idea. She writes the first drafts of every chapter. I am the man that just makes the plot outlines, writes the second drafts, and responds to the reviews. She is the one ensuring the story is actually spell checked and grammerically (or whatever the word is) correct.

So every ounce of praise goes to her for this. I want you all to know that.

This story is her baby as well as mine, and I thank her for it. It is our love note and our middle finger to the world of manga and anime. I hope you all enjoy.

Sarah and Kevin have joined forces, bitches, buckle up for a wild ride.

Dr. Temperance Brennan, world famous anthropologist and overall bane of any murderer the FBI set their sights on, sat in one of the round corner booths at Wong Fu's, her friends and co-workers surrounding her. After Sid brought the food out (because, as everyone knew, you don't order at Wong Fu's. Sid just knows. Ordering only leads to tummy aches), the squints plus one FBI agent discussed the case they just finished.

The murder had been an exhausting one, both in the body and in the mind. The victim, Roy Bellows, the editor of "Manga Now!", had been found dead in his own printing press, sandwiched between chapters of Dr. Slump and Eyeshield. The case had led to the team to immerse themselves with all things Anime and Manga, while also juggling the hot tempers and cultural clashes of the artists, writers, publishers and fans.

Of course, it had turned out to be in vain, as the murderer had been his wife, sick and tired of him putting the magazine before her.

In the end, it didn't matter what path they had taken. All that had mattered was that they caught the bad guy (or girl, in this case), and were now able to celebrate.

Thus, each member of the team sat in the booth, their own individual orders slowly being consumed, while a bottle of sake was passed about (and consumed much quicker.)

"After Warren Granger's case," Tempe said, "Zack started to read graphic novels, right? Did he ever get into manga?"

"Granger?" Booth asked.

"The superhero kid," Angela reminded him.

"Ah."

"Oh yeah," said Hodgins, licking his fingers before taking another octopus puff and popping it into his mouth. "He stopped watching Stargate for a week because of...what was it, Kugio?"

"Yu-Gi-Oh," offered Angela. "Ancient Egyptian Pharaoh's soul inside a pyramid necklace that allows him to possess whoever is wearing it."

"Oh! I read that one," Temperance exclaimed, bouncing up and down in her seat. Booth had bombarded her with all kinds of Japanese graphic novels during the week, saying it would help her 'get to know' the victim better, or something of the sort. Temperance had decided to play along, just to make him happy and keep him from pouting, but had been shocked when she had found several of them entertaining, especially Yu-Gi-Oh!. The Egyptian aspect of that particular manga caught and held her interest. "It was extremely entertaining. It wasn't historically accurate, as there was no Nameless Pharaoh, but it was captivating. The artwork was exceptional as well." She paused. "I do wish they had focused less on the card games."

Cam rolled her eyes. "How else would they sell said card games to silly American children then?"

Booth chuckled. "Aw, does someone not like Japanese cartoons?"

"I just don't see the application, to be honest. The stories become way too complex, and the characters spend way too much time on one single problem." Cam scoffed playfully. "I can understand why you would enjoy it, Seeley...a world filled with women with breasts bigger than their heads and butts you can bounce quarters off of."

Booth wagged his fork at her. "Hey, I like them for more than that...demons, swords, the eternal battle between good and evil..."

Hodgins raised an eyebrow. "I would have thought you would shy away from that, Booth...it being all "un-American" and such."

"Don't get me wrong, Superman and Green Arrow will always be number one in my heart, right next to apple pie and baseball. But that doesn't mean I can't be a well rounded person."

"Of course not." Temperance said, before she took a bite of her chicken wing. The meat was strange looking, breaded with odd colored herbs and spices. "This chicken is wonderful," she stated, licking her lips. "It reminds me of an Amazonian ceremonial meat I sampled once. Of course, I believe they used jaguar-"

"Sweetie?" Angela interrupted, suddenly concerned. "That wouldn't be the same 'ceremonial meat' that screws with peoples minds, right?"

"It doesn't actually 'screw with your mind'," Tempe replied. "The village elders claimed that it allows you to enter other worlds, but everyone knows that's impossible. Beside, how could Sid have gotten the recipe? It's an Amazonian ceremonial dish. It's not something you put on a buffet." She took another bite, reveling in the taste.

"Dr. Brennan sure does love the hot wings," said Sid. "Some South American recipe, you said?"

"Si," Miguel said. "Better with jaguar, but chicken work."


	2. Chapter 2

Temperance woke up the next morning feeling different. It wasn't a hangover, she knew that much. She hadn't had quite enough sake for one. And she knew what a hangover felt like, despite what Booth may have thought. She had allowed herself to "cut loose" plenty of times...she just didn't do it with the reckless abandon that Booth and his friends seemed to have. Nevertheless, she felt odd, as if she had awoken to find herself in another skin, switched during the night and making her feel all topsy turvy.

'I sound like Alice in Wonderland.' Her muddled brain thought.

She tried to run a mental checklist, to see if she could figure out just what was out of place, but nothing came to mind, most likely because her mind was still half asleep. She twisted around, her bare feet hitting the cold floor. She made her way to the bathroom, still trying to shake the cobwebs from her gray matter. Only, when she pulled open the door, she found herself walking into a row of hanging skirts and shirts.

Apparently someone had, in the middle of the night, turned her bathroom into her closet.

Realizing just how silly that sounded, Temperance looked around. She opened her eyes fully for the first time to discover that she was not in her apartment to begin with.

She honestly wasn't sure where she was.

It was like a ritzy, futuristic hotel room. Like the Waldorf, but without the nutela-filled gold caramel apples. 'Because, let's face it, I'd get one if I could,' she thought. Everything was made of metal and plastic, though both looked nothing like they should have. The bed was spartan. However, the sheets were rumpled enough to prove that she had been sleeping in this place for more than a few minutes.

'Was I really that buzzed?' she wondered. Temperance tried to remember exactly what had happened the night before, but the  
last memory she held onto featured her slapping Booth's hand away as he tried to steal her napkin.

Temperance realized that if she hoped to solve this new little mystery, she would have to prioritize. Pausing to make sure no one was watching, she gave her armpit a very un-Temperance-like sniff.

'Shower first,' she decided.

Letting the slip she was wearing fall to the ground, Temperance's nude form breezed through the room till she finally found the bathroom. She flicked on the light and shielded her eyes from their brightness. She leaned down, startled to find that the shower had no knobs, merely a computer screen. Coming to the conclusion that she was too sleepy to even figure that out, she went to the sink to splash some water on her face.

She never got a chance to do so, though, as she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror.

The reflection that stared at her was not her own.

Her eyes were a deep steel gray, and huge, taking up most of her face. They were able to do so because her nose was almost nonexistent, barely even able to be called a 'button nose'. Her mouth was tiny, but what little there was to it was puffy and red, as if bee-stung. Her hair was drastically different as well. Dark brown, with electric blue bangs that covered her forehead, her ponytail now reached just below her tailbone.

Speaking of her butt, Temperance didn't remember it being so...round, nor so firm. Oh, Temperance knew she had a nice behind, plenty of men had said so, but looking at the globes that lay before her, or rather behind her, she wondered if she could truly bounce a quarter off their firm flesh.

The size of her waist should have been impossible. There was no way all of her internal organs could fit inside her torso with such a tiny waist. Unless, of course, they packed up and moved north, deciding to take up residence in her breasts. At least that would explain their immensely drastic increase in size. It was amazing she hadn't noticed them immediately, considering it was as if two bowling balls had suddenly grafted themselves to her chest. If they made size K bras, they still wouldn't be big enough.

It also occurred to her that she was further from the floor than before. Taking a moment to gauge herself, she realized that, apparently, she had grown eight inches overnight, making her roughly 6'4". Her long shapely legs ended in tiny feet that should be in no way able to help her balance. Long, graceful fingers that tapered into slim tips ran along her bare stomach, marveling at her skin. Not a single flaw could be found, be it blemish or mole. It looked as if her skin had been airbrushed, only in real life.

Temperance found herself hyperventilating, her mind working in overdrive to figure out just what had happened to her. How, in the span of a few hours, she had changed from her normal self into this...this...impossible vision. She looked more like the male fantasy of the female form than a true woman.

"Hey Bones, you in there?"

Booth. Temperance was not one to believe in God, but right now she felt like dropping to her perfectly sculpted knees and thanking him. That is, assuming she could clasp her hands around her mammoth breasts. It didn't matter to her that she looked like a cross between a porn star and Wonder Woman. Right now, she needed her partner's help, to have him figure out why she had suddenly experienced a second puberty that involved changing hair color and giant eyes.

Struggling to get her slip back on, she called out to him that she would be but a moment. She realized, much to her surprised, that she was managing this body quite well. By all accounts, she should be stumbling about, her center of gravity thrown into the trash due to her new longer legs, thin waist and monstrous melons. But instead, she glided through the room like a champion ice dancer, even the most modest of her movements both graceful and sexual.

Deciding that dwelling on this new piece of information would overload her already taxed brain, Temperance moved towards the door and threw it open. "Ok Booth, I know I look different-"

That was as far as she got.

Booth was standing before her. She would know him anywhere.

But, apparently, whatever had made her change into this new form was contagious, as Booth had caught it as well.

His deep brown hair didn't have the streaks like she had, other than some darker slashes, but it was now much longer, almost 5 inches high and sticking up 3 inches past his forehead. His eyes, a stunning shade that could only be called 'electric' were not as big as hers, but were still huge, though they were half lidded. His nose, though, had also shrunk, while his lips had all but disappeared, replaced by at best a thin line.

His shoulders were broad, much broader than she remembered, and his body rippled with muscles. She could see the veins popped out through his skin even as he breathed, the flesh of his 6 foot 9 frame just as perfect as hers. His left hand alone looked strong enough to twist her bed into a pretzel, if he so chose.

He still had on his normal dress shirt and tie, though his 'Cocky' belt buckle was now in Japanese. Her eyes wandered from his left side to his right, and she could not stop the horrified gasp that burst from her bee-stung lips.

Booth's right arm was gone.

Oh, there was something there, all right. But it wasn't flesh and blood. Starting at his shoulder, where his dress shirt's sleeve had been ripped away, was a robotic arm, just as massive as his left, real arm, only covered in glowing blue lines that were a mockery of veins. Panels and switches lined his limb, and she could detect a small servo whining slightly as he reached up with the cool metal to brush a lock from her face.

"You look the same to me," He said, before leaning down and giving her a toe curling kiss. After a minute they pulled apart, and he said, "Get dressed, Bones, we've got a case. The High Commander and Lieutenant want to see us in ten minutes." He closed the door, leaving her alone to get dressed, still befuddled from the kiss and everything else that had just happened.

'High Commander and Lieutenant?' she thought, confused. Then she remembered, and she wasn't sure how she remembered this, as she had never known this to begin with, that they were not in the Jeffersonian Institute in Washington D.C., or her apartment, or even a hotel. They were, in fact, on an airship; The CS Jeffersonian. She had no idea how she knew that, only that she did. A thought came to her, unbidden, and with it hope that she wasn't crazy. 'This is too much like my dream in which I was Wonder Woman.' Her mind played over that little adventure, and shuddered slightly. 'Let's just hope I do not run into the Joker again.'

Still confused, but at least glad she now had a hypothesis for what was happening, she opened the closet she had thought was her bathroom, and discovered that all of her clothes had been replaced. Instead of the sensible and comfortable pants suits, there was a veritable rainbow of plaid micro mini-skirts, black knee high boots with 4 inch stiletto heels, tiny white blouses with hardly any buttons, and a few black jackets of differing styles.

She grabbed a shirt and a blue skirt and went to the dresser, only to discover...no bras. 'In what kind of world would I not have a bra?' she thought, opening the next drawer. 'The same kind of world where Booth has a robotic arm, I have huge breasts and blue hair and, apparently, wear thongs with skirts.' She rummaged through the drawer some more, trying to find a pair of underwear that was more appropriate, and failing miserably. All thongs, no bras, big butt, giant breasts. 'Definitely a man's fantasy, rather than real life.' She sighed resignedly and dressed in the skimpy outfit. She chose a shiny leather coat that reached the floor, but only zipped from the waist to about halfway up her chest. 'Just perfect,' she thought, staring down at the massive flesh pillows that were preventing her from seeing her own feet.

After she dressed, she ran a brush through her hair (which should've taken longer than it did, considering it's increase in length) and left. Booth was still waiting for her in the hall, and considering that the memories that seemed to be popping into her head were being quiet for the moment, she decided to just follow him, and hope he would not notice her wide, startled eyes. Thus, she left the safety of the room and journeyed onto the ship's bridge, pressed like some pervert's wet dream and following her best-friend-turned-cyborg.

* * *

Mr Chaos' Note: Well, Temperance has gone down the rabbit hole, and it looks like she got a few "Upgrades" before she found the bottom. Sarah and I are both hoping that a fan who has some skill at drawing will do some pictures for the story, showcasing Manga-Temperance, Manga-Booth and the others that are too come.

Next time, we meet the rest of the crew of the CS Jeffersonian...as well as the High Commander and his Lt.


	3. Chapter 3

While walking with Booth, Temperance sorted through her memories, as that prevented her from looking like an idiot, staring out the windows and down at the tiny blue globe she knew to be the Earth. She still knew everything she knew before, her life and history, but there were new things as well, things she knew she had never experienced yet had at the same time. She knew that here she was considered a Bone Detective, someone who can touch a bone and instantly know the identity of the person it belonged to, rather than an Anthropologist. Which, when Temperance thought about it, was actually a useful ability. Yes, it meant that Angela was out of a job, but it would make solving murders go a bit quicker.

A pair of heavily reinforced doors slid open with a swipe of Booth's hand under a DNA sequencer. They arrived at the briefing area to find Dr. Saroyan (Captain Cam Saroyan, Temperance remembers out of nowhere) dressed in a black leather suit similar to her Cat Woman costume, but without the mask and with a very real and very active panther's tail lazily swaying behind her. Captain Cam turned towards them when they entered, and Temperance saw that she was carrying a whip at her side. Only...it wasn't a normal whip, but a whip with blades running along it. When Cam saw them, she flicked the weapon and it straightened to come together as a short sword.

"Good, you're here," she said. Her tone, while still Cam's, was frosted over. "Now we just have to wait for Dr. Hodgins and-"

"Here! You can start now," Hodgins exclaimed, hurrying through the doors. He was wearing a white lab coat instead of blue, and his hair was poofier than it should be, making it more like a brown afro. His eyes were clear, crystal blue, and perfectly round giving him a slightly crazed look. Temperance suddenly had the image of a mad scientist, stand beside his creation, screaming "IT'S ALIVE!"

Behind him was Angela, wearing even less than she, Temperance, was. Again, it was similar to her Halloween costume, but it was different in that it was...significantly less. Instead of the feathered hat, Angela wore a silver circlet, and in lieu of the long skirt, she wore...a thong. And no one seemed to notice or even give her a second glance.

'Now I definitely know this is not real," Tempe thought. 'Angela's not prude, but even she wouldn't wear that to work.'

She turned her attention back to Cam, only for a four-tailed, winged racoon the color of sun bleached clay to fly up and settle on her shoulder. She was so startled that her entire body buckled, causing the creature to fall and hit the floor.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Brennan," it spoke with Zack's voice. "I didn't mean to startle you."

"What have I told you about doing that, Zack?" Booth questioned, clearly annoyed. Temperance realized this must have been a common occurrence.

"You said not to land on your shoulder. You said nothing about Dr. Brennan." Zack got back on his feet, took flight, and landed on a high platform that must have been there specifically for this purpose. Before Booth could comment, Zack turned his attention elsewhere. "Captain Cam, can we get on with the debriefing?"

"Of course, Zack," Cam replied, and with that, she turned her attention to the monitor. "High Commander, Lieutenant, we have all gathered. May we begin?"

Temperance looked at the large monitor and saw...

"Kevin!" she exclaimed, surprised, only to be shushed by Booth.

"You can't call him that right now, Bones," he whispered. "He's High Commander Kevinos. We can only call him Kevin when we're not on a case, remember? Procedures and all that."

Of course she remembered, too little too late, and the memories surfaced of her and Booth arguing about her doing just that in the past. She also remembered, rather out of turn, that Angela was a demi-goddess of love that bound herself to Hodgins, Zack was the only one of his species, and 'High Commander Kevinos' was the head of the Crime Solution Wing of the Crimes Cabinet.

The first thing she noticed of the High Commander was his sword, a long light beam blade that wouldn't have looked out of place in a Star Wars film. 'Does every male carry a sword in this world?' she thought. Her mind dug up some random facts about swords being considered by some historians as visible representations of a king's genitals, thus explaining why such care was made for them to be large and ornate. Pulling her self back to "reality" she took in his appearance, from his open white bomber jacket and lack of a shirt. Since they were on screen, she was unable to discern what he was wearing below that.

Taking a moment to stare at something other than his clothing, Temperance was surprised to find that Kevin ('Kevinos' she reminded herself) had been changed as well, but different from herself and Booth. From the furniture that surrounded him, he must have been close to 7 feet tall, and his eyes were not that much bigger, more square and narrowed, their color that of frozen steel. His jaw was squared and his beard extended past it, reminding her of the beard designs found on a sarcophagus.

Next to him was a much shorter woman with a short black ponytail and bright emerald green eyes behind a pair of rectangular glasses. The Lieutenant, presumably. Temperance's first impression of this woman was 'She reminds me of Lady Blackhawk, and yet not.' She wore a black, form-fitting, three-quarter-sleeve uniform with red leather gloves. On her chest was Davinci's Vetruvian Man in a hexagon, the emblem of the Jeffersonian. Suddenly, Temperance knew this woman was Lieutenant Sarai, second in command and part time poet and writer of the "Scarlette" short horror stories.

'Why I remembered that little fact...' Temperance wondered, bemused. "Seems like an out of place fact, like someone was trying to shamelessly plug something.'

When the High Commander began speaking, she stopped spacing and focused.

"Seto Kaiba called us," he said, his tone hard as the steel of his blade. "Apparently, a body has washed up on the shore of Domino City and he wants the best, also known as us, to investigate." He looked at Booth. "Detective Yusuke Urameshi will be in on this investigation. The woman who found her called him, and he wants to see this through. Can you handle that?"

Temperance glanced at Booth and was surprised to see him looking more annoyed than she thought he should. "I can, sir," said Booth. "But if he even so much as whispers Rebecca's name, I'll throttle him."

High Commander Kevinos lips twitched ever so slightly. "I can live with that, Agent Booth" he said.

Lieutenant Sarai looked at the High Commander with a look that clearly said 'you will tell me immediately what that was supposed to mean' and then turned back to the group. "Mr. Kaiba has informed us that this is the first murder in ten years within the city's limits, and as such, wants it solved immediately. We, of course, desire the same, and the fact that Mr. Kaiba provides our department with much of its technology has no bearing on this case." She glanced at Hodgins, daring him to say a word. "Now, the body hasn't been move since it was discovered early this morning, so the launch pod will take you to Domino Pier, and from there it's a short walk to the crime scene."

"I want this solved quickly," Kevinos told them, his tone giving no quarter. "No funny business, no distractions. I want the murderer found."

"The murderer will be found. The length of time depends on how good they were covering their tracks," Temperance informed him.

Lt. Sarai frowned. "You are the best in your field, Dr. Brennan...that means certain expectations have been created for you. See that our faith has not been misplaced." Before Temperance could aruge back, the screen went blank.

"Nice work, Dr. B," Hodgins said with a laugh. "Always nice to see you give the Powers That Be something to chew on."

"Enough," Cam stated. "Hodgins, I believe just for that little retort, you have earned yourself some time in the field. Go with Booth and Brennan and bring back any samples you can find."

Angela grabbed Hodgins and pulled him in for a hard kiss. "Return soon, master," she whispered, giving his ass a squeeze before vanishing from sight in a puff of pink smoke.

Temperance, Booth, and Hodgins made their way to the launch pod, which, for the most part, resembled a cross between a reentry shuttle and Booth's SUV, and Zack jumped into Temperance's open backpack. When they were all settled into the pods, they launched them and flew to the city below.

* * *

Co-A/N: Hi, Darkly Dreaming here. Since Mr. "Single Man Wink Wink" Chaos got a shameless plug, I've decided I get one, too. ;D  
"Lt. Sarai's" stories and poems can be found here:  
.com/~darklydreaming.  
But be warned: the "Scarlette" stories are rated M for a reason.  
Thanks for reading! ^_^

* * *

Mr. Chaos Note: It is not shameless at all to basically tell everyone reading that they need to find me a girlfriend. Desperate, yes, but not shameful.

* * *

Mom Chaos Note: Yes son, it is shameful. *Sigh* Someone please help him.


	4. Chapter 4

Their pods left behind, the team made the half mile trek from the Domino Pier to the crime scene. It was a familar sight, one Temperace was glad to see, after all the craziness of the last hour; police buzzed about the remains, a few onlookers, even at this late hour, glanced over barracades, and of course the twisted remains that had once been a living person.

Hodgins was already moving past the body, taking a moment to shove away from yellow mouse-like creatures that were feeding on the carcass before gathering some soil samples. Temperance immediately sought out the pelvic bone to determine gender. "The victim is female," She called out to Booth, "never gave birth..." She moved to touch the bone.

Instantly, she was assaulted with a name, face, height, and weight of the victim. It was like seeing one of Angela's reconstruction, brought forth inside her own skull. Then, just as quickly as it had come, the vision vanished, leaving her panting quickly but otherwise fine.

"Serena Tsukino, blonde hair, blue eyes," said Bones, forcing herself to calm down. "She was 4'11", and approximately 110lbs." To herself, she stared down at her hand and mused 'This really is an amazing ability.'

"Yeah," said Booth. "What's with the sailor suit?" He motioned towards the skimpy outfit the victim was wearing, made up of a tight blouse that, at one time, had been white, and a mini skirt. "Last I checked, the navy had a stricter dress code."

Detective Yusuke Urameshi walked up to them just in time to hear the description. "Booth," he greeted stiffly, not making eye contact. "Dr. Brennan. Serena Tsukino, you said?" He stared at the two of them when it was clear neither knew what exactly the importance of the name was. "You need to get to Domino more often. She's a lounge singer, goes by the stage name Sailor Moon. Or she used to, at least." He shrugged.

"Did you know her?" asked Dr. Brennan.

"Not personally," Yusuke replied. "But she was a hit at The Dark Paladin." Temperance raised an eyebrow and he shrugged. "That's the lounge inside the Magical Hats casino." He sat down on his haunches and looked at the body, giving a long whistle. "Actually, she was hot stuff." He stopped at a look from Booth. "Sorry if that offends ya, Booth.."

Booth glared at him and said "Yeah. Who runs the Magical Hats?"

"...you really need to get down from that airship more. Casinos owned by the 'King of Games' Yugi Moto," Yusuke replied, chuckling slightly. "You'll love him, Booth. The going wagers are he's crazy, possessed or eccentric."

Booth thought that over a minute and finally replied with "He might be worth looking into." Temperance could tell Booth did not want to take the advice of the detective, but couldn't pass up a lead.

"We need to get the remains back to the Jeffersonian," Bones interjected.

"And I have water samples, sand, and some pikachus that I need to test," Hodgins said, holding up a cage full of the squeaking little pokemon. "As well as some interesting..." Booth and Yusuke each gave him a stern look. "...you don't care. I'll just beam everything up then." He pulled what looked like a makeup compact out of his labcoat pocket, punched in a few numbers, and said "Beam me up, Scotty!"

"Scotty?" Dr. Brennan asked, disbelieving, as Hodgins disappeared in a shower of light.

"Yeah, Bones," Booth retorted. "Scotty's the guy in charge of the transporter room ." He shook his head, "You know, we've talked about this...you really should pay more attention to the people you work with." He slapped her on the back with his normal hand. "Now, we should check out this 'King of Games' guy, see what he has to say."

Bones merely shrugged and said "OK."


	5. Chapter 5

Co-A/N: No pikachus were harmed in the writing of this fic.

* * *

"PikaCHUUUUUUU!"

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

"If you covered the cages in rubber like I told you to, that wouldn't happen," Zack said without looking up from the remains. He was pacing up and down the examination table looking for the cause of death. Literally the examination table, as if he had walked around on the ground, it would have been 2 feet above his head.

Hodgins groaned, entire face black, an electrical current running through his hair. "You are going to pay for that, you fuzzy little menace!"

"I did nothing." Zack said, confused.

"The...other little fuzzy menace." The Pikachu stuck its tongue out at him.

"The C2 vertebra is fractured," Zack muttered to himself. It's a good thing he has perfect recall. All paws.

"I'm fine Zack, no need to be concerned." Hodgins said sarcastically, walking over to his friend. He ran a finger along the spots where his eyebrows use to be. "Wait, fractured? What, like from a hanging?"

Zack looked up from the body. "Did I say the hyoid was broken? No. This wasn't a hanging." He turned his attention back to the vertebra. "It's just the C2."

"Soooooo, someone snapped her neck?" Hodgins asked.

Zack glared at him wagging his little paw at him. "You know I don't like to jump to conclusions. It's possible that her neck was forcibly and deliberately twisted, but it's also possible that she twisted her neck while skiing. However," he once again turned his attention to the corpse in front of him, "It's impossible to tell until we have more evidence. Nevertheless, I haven't seen any other fatal wound, so I'm confident that this is the cause of death."

Hodgins just rolled his eyes and went back to rubberize his pikachu cages.

* * *

In another part of the lab, Angela waved her hands about, chanting gently in Latin. A bowl of salt water trembled before the liquid rose up, taking the form of a beautiful woman with gills, her dress made of scales and small crabs crawling about her body.

"Hello Ange," Calypso said, holding out her hand and stroking the crab that had wandered onto her palm. "Business or pleasure?"

"Business. I need to know about the tides near the Port of Domino. Would they have been active enough to move a body about?"

"Sorry Ange," The sea goddess said. "The tides and currents have been pretty regular about a dead girl?" Angela nodded. "Your dead girl must've been dumped carelessly into the sea without a thought somewhere close to Domino." She seemed disgruntled that some human had been dumpedinto her beautiful ocean. "It had to've been around 4 days ago. Some of us felt a disturbance in the tranquility then, as if the sea herself was disgusted with what had been deposited in her."

Angela merely shrugged and said "That's ok, sweetie. That's more information than we had before. Thanks."

"So, you still sticking with the scrawny little human? Because I hear Kalegore wants your phone number."

"Sorry, I don't do Gods of Body Odor."

Calypso shrugged. "Then what about a trade, one of my slaves for your Hodgins...I could rock his world."

"Goodbye, Cal." Angela waved her hands and the spell broke, which made the water rain down to the floor.

* * *

Zack was on his way to contact Dr. Brennan when he heard another scream, but not from Hodgins.

"What are you doing to those harmless pikachus?" Zack exclaimed.

Hodgins gave him a look that said 'Are you crazy?' "Harmless? I don't have eyebrows 'cause of these things!" he pointed to a pikachu, which did its best to give Zack an innocent look. "Besides," Hodgins continued. "These rodents have evidence in their tiny digestive systems. This is the easiest way to get that evidence." He picked up the one next to the one that smiled, put it in the blender, closed the lid, and turned it on pulse.

"Yeah, maybe for a bucket of maggots, but pikachus?" Zack said over the scream. "That's horribly inhumane!"

"You're only saying that because you need to get laid," said Hodgins. "You just can't get a girl."

"It's a little hard to get laid when you're the only one of your species!" Zack yelled.

At that moment Captain Cam walked through the door and stopped dead. "I don't want to know what you two were talking about," she said. "But I do want to know if either of you have anything." Her tail was twitching back and forth in mild annoyance.

Zack leaped onto the table nearest her. "Dr. Hodgins feels it's necessary to blend the pikachus to obtain the evidence in their digestive systems," he said. "Even though we both know it would be more humane to just feed them laxatives."

"It's quicker and more amusing to do things this way," was all Hodgins had to say about it. "Be glad I didn't have time to build the little guillotine."

Zack continued, "But I have found the cause of death. The C2 vertebrae was fractured." His tails twitched at the ends in smug satisfaction. To Hodgins he said, "I believe that makes me King of the Lab."

"Yeah yeah, whatever," said Hodgins as he rolled his eyes. He turned back to Cam, who was looking past him at the remaining pikachu. "Captain Saroyan?" he inquired.

"Uh...I think your pikachu just coughed up a hairball," she said. Hodgins rushed over and picked up the hairball with forceps and put it in an evidence jar.

"I never would've found this if this little guy had been blended. I'll analyze it later." He screwed a lid on the jar and put it with some other sample jars. "Well, we may as well blend you too," he said to the last pikachu.

"And that's my cue to leave," said Cam. "I hope you get some useful evidence out of this."

Zack jumped off the table and said, "I think I'll join you, if you don't mind. I don't need to witness this. I have to tell Dr. Brennan I found the cause of death."

"PIKA!" The Formerly-Smiling Pikachu screamed, shocking Hodgins before it darted off under a cabinet.

"Hey, get back here!" Hodgins screamed. "You have a date with a blender!"


	6. Chapter 6

"My life is no longer unmanageable. My family is no longer harmed by my destructive gambling tendencies. I have humbly asked God to remove my shortcomings," Temperance heard Booth mumbling to himself.

"You were a compulsive gambler," she told him. It was horrible for her to think, but she was actually glad Booth had had a gambling problem. It made this strange world of big eyes, poofy hair, and large breasts actually seem normal. "You shouldn't be here."

"I'll be fine, Bones," Booth replied. "God has removed my shortcomings and my life is no longer unmanageable."

"12 step program?" she asked.

"12 step program," He nodded. "Now, let's go find the pit boss."

"Pit boss?" Temperance asked. She knew little of casinos, and had to wonder why they would need a pit. To throw people in? That would be dangerous... Maybe Booth wanted to check the pit for bodies-

"The guy that watches the employees," Booth explained. "You have the dealers, a floorman for every three dealers, and the pit boss. The floormen usually take care of most things, but the pit boss is called in if someone's caught cheating. You know, counting cards, duplicate cards in a deck, that sort of thing." At Tempe's look of understanding, he stopped and started to look around. "He would be some place where he could see everything. He'd probably look a little like CIA. Sunglasses, black suit, earpiece. Ah." Booth spotted someone fitting that description on a balcony that overlooked the whole pit. "That's probably him. He's our best bet of finding our schizo casino owner."

"Why would you think that?" Bones asked.

"Well, if I was that crazy I'd never leave my room," Booth answered.

*DD~MC*DD~MC*DD~MC*

"The suit and woman appear to be approaching you, sir," he heard over the earpiece.

"I see that, Duke, thank you," the brown haired man replied. "They look official...better feel them up, see if they are going to be trouble."

The Pit Boss descended the stairs from the balcony and met the man and woman at the bottom. He gave them his best charming smile, even if it echoed fake. "Hello, my name is Tristan Taylor. I'm the Pit Boss here. Can I help you?"

Booth showed him his badge. "I'm Special Agent Seeley Booth, this is my partner Temperance Brennan. We're with the FBI. We'd like to speak to the owner of the casino."

Tristan looked from Booth to Dr. Brennan, though you couldn't tell, what with the shades. He appeared to be listening to something, then he looked toward the 'eye in the sky' and nodded once.

"He's looking to the ceiling...is he praying or insane?" Temperance asked. "Maybe he is also mentally unbalanced..."

Booth just glanced at her, begging her to be quiet.

When Tristan looked back at Booth he said, "Mr. Moto is a very busy man, but I'm sure he can make time for the FBI. Please follow me." With that, he turned and headed for the elevators, not bothering to see if they follwed. "Mr. Moto lives in a penthouse on the top floor. That's where we're headed."

"Why are we going to his rooms?" Dr. Brennan asked. "Wouldn't it be more appropriate to meet in a conference room?"

The Pit Boss looked at her with a look she couldn't quite describe and said, "Mr. Moto doesn't leave his rooms much." He said it as if it explained everything. She supposed that in a way it had, but she was still left feeling a bit confused. Booth gave her an "I Told You So" grin, but otherwise remained silent.

When they reached the top floor they exited the elevator and turned left toward a set of French doors. The Pit Boss pulled a Master key card out of his pocket and unlocked the doors. He opened them a crack so they wouldn't lock again but stopped. "Mr. Moto is a little...sensitive. His condition makes for awkward conversations sometimes. Tread carefully." He made eye contact with both of them, or tried to through his aviators. It was clear he wasn't warning them for their comfort... He was warning them for their safety...naming what he would do to them if they screwed with the boss. They both nodded and proceeded through the doors.

"Mr. Moto sir, the FBI is here to ask you some questions."

"Oh, hey Tristan," Yugi said rather cheerfully. "Yeah, come on in. And how many times do I have to tell you to call me Yugi? Just because you work for me doesn't mean we've stopped being friends, Tristan."

"Yeah yeah, alright Yuge," he said. "Anyway, this is FBI Special Agent Seeley Booth." Booth just continued to stare at him. When he didn't say anything Brennan looked at him. "Booth." He came back to his senses and introduced her.

"I'm a Forensic Anthropologist with the Jeffersonian," she said.

"Mr. Moto-"

"Please, call me Yugi," Yugi said, He was a tiny little thing, about 5 feet tall, perched on a chair, swinging his legs back and forth. He looked more like a woodland fairytale creature than a casino owner.

"Yugi." He paused, still wondering at the man's small stature and strange hair. "We have some questions regarding a former employee. Serena Tsukino? I believe she went by the stage name 'Sailor Moon.'"

"Ah, yes, Serena," Yugi said. "Beautiful woman. Wonderful voice. Yes, I hired her as a lounge singer for the Dark Paladin downstairs." He sat down and offered them a seat and drinks. They each took the former and refused the latter. "She was very popular with the men, but I think the women were a bit jealous. I never met her personally, but I spoke with her on the phone once, to tell her she was hired."

"You never met your own employee?" Booth inquired.

Bones interrupted, "It's not uncommon. Some employers are too busy, or simply do not care enough to do things themselves. They would rather have underlings do menial tasks, such as hiring and firing minor employees."

"Is that the case, Mr. Moto?" Booth asked.

"Yugi. And no, not at all," said Yugi. He grew serious, speaking from the heart. "It's true that I'm busy, but I've been suffering from Multiple Personality Disorder since high school, so I rarely interact with the employees. Just Tristan and Joey, really. Joey's the head of security," he explained.

"That's very good for you, being able to talk about your condition with such ease." Temperance stated.

"Okay," Booth said, getting the conversation back on track. "So who would be the best person to talk to about her?" He directed this question toward Tristan.

"The bartender, the regulars," he said. "They might know some about her."

Booth and Brennan rose from the chairs and shook hands. "Thank you, Mr. Moto, Mr. Taylor. We'll make our way down to the Dark Paladin then."

As Booth looked Yugi in the eye, he thought he noticed a slight glint, like they had hardened. And the way the light was reflecting off of them made them look almost red. He also appeared to be holding himself a little taller, like royalty among servants. When he spoke, it was with a slightly deeper voice, like he had gone through puberty in a split second. "You are welcome, Agent Booth. Doctor. Now, I must get back to running my kingdom." He sort of half bowed to them, turned, and left the room, leaving them staring at him funny.

Tristan grimaced. "Oh boy." Tristan touched his left hand to his ear and said, "Joey, Yugi needs his meds. He's reverted back to Atem." He looked back at them and said "Sorry about that. His "other personality" is a five thousand year old pharaoh."

Doctor Brennan perked up at that. "You mean Pharaoh Atem, son of Pharaoh Aknamkanon? I went on a dig once in what was thought to be his tomb. Of course, the pharaoh's name was removed from everything it was on so we were never sure, but it almost had to be his. I've never heard of the Egyptians erasing a name from history other than Pharaoh Atem's." She looked like she wanted to interrogate him, so Booth reminded her that they had other people to interrogate downstairs.

Temperance glanced back as Yugi...or Atem...sat down in a computer chair, head held high, issuing silent orders. Booth shoved her out of the room, Temperance frustrated she couldn't stay.

Being a professional sucked sometimes.

* * *

A/N: Hey, Sarah here. Sorry it took so long, guys! Second year college student and all... Now that marching season is winding down I'll hopefully have more time on my hands to write (and the energy to do so!). I'm going to try my damndest to get chapter 7 written, edited, and posted by Halloween (and no, there will not be any Halloween themes. It's weird enough as it is. Lol). Hope you guys liked this one.

Next up, the Dark Paladin and some familiar faces!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Ok, so I know I said Halloween and it's the day after Christmas, but...I'M SORRY! Writer's block does that to me. ANYWHO, here is chapter 7. This fanfic has more cameos than The Library has Vashta Nerada. (Not really, there were like, a million million Vashta Nerada. And if you didn't get that reference, shame on you. Watch Doctor Who: Silence in the Library and Forest of the Dead.)  
Without further ado, chapter 7!  
~Darkly Dreaming

* * *

The Dark Paladin assailed the senses the moment they opened the doors. Temperance didn't know what half the smells that danced up her nose were, but she knew they must be illegal. Purple and blue lights cast a strange, ethereal glow about the club, as denizens sat lulled in their chairs, sipping on glowing drinks and murmuring to themselves. The first thing the partners heard as they made their way into the main area of the club was someone singing karaoke. It was a shockingly moving rendition of "Am I Blue" sung by an odd looking fellow with a very skinny lower body and incredibly buff upper body, black sunglasses, and a very large, very blonde afro. Booth was about to comment on the contrast of voice and looks when a large fuzzball zoomed by his head.

"Woah! What the hell was that?" Booth asked, looking around for whoever threw the fuzzball at him, several patrons glaring at his loud outburst. To his right he saw a man laughing and pointing at him, obviously amused with himself. Booth, not pleased in the slightest, went up to him, pointing his robotic finger at him and asked "What are you laughing at, ya white-haired punk?"

In a British accent, the punk replied "I'm laughing at the look on your face when I threw that kuriboh at you." He then looked to where the kuriboh had landed, watched it rise back to eye level and float back over to the rude Brit, slightly crosseyed and listing to the left. It then took a shot of tequila and fell to the table.

"Booth, leave the punk and his lover alone." Temperance stated, tugging on his arm.

The punk frowned. "I'm not gay, I'm British!" he angrily defended.

"There's a difference?" Booth snarked, before Temperance led him away. "Let's talk to the bartender."

The bartender was probably one of the more normal looking people in the entire establishment. Spiky blond hair, blue eyes, and marks on his cheeks that almost looked like cat whiskers. He wore the usual bartending garb; black shirt, black pants, white apron at his waist, but with a blue headband with a sort of swirl design. He looked up at the FBI agent and his partner as they approached.

"What can I get you two tonight?" he asked.

"Hello, my name's FBI Special Agent Seeley Booth," he said, flashing his badge to the bartender. "This is my partner Dr. Temperance Brennan. Do you know this woman?" Booth held up a picture of Serena with his mechanical hand.

The bartender glanced at the photo, then back to Agent Booth. "Yeah, that's Serena. Most people know her by her stage name Sailor Moon. She sang here sometimes. Haven't seen her in a while, though. What happened?" He continued to wipe a glass as he spoke, not remotely expecting the answer he would be getting.

"She was murdered," Dr. Brennan answered. "Dumped in the ocean approximately 2 weeks ago and washed up on shore yesterday."

The bartender was so shocked he almost dropped the glass he'd been cleaning. "Murdered...?" he whispered. "How? Why? Who would do that to her?"

"That's exaclty what we're trying to figure out, Mr...?" said Booth.

"Naruto. Naruto Uzumaki," he replied, still staring, shocked, at the bar.

"Naruto," Booth nodded. "Did you and Serena have something going on?"

Naruto, snapping out of his staring contest with the wood, shook his head. "Nah...she wouldn't go for me. Asked her out once, got shot down flat. Guess I shoulda expected it, she did it to just about everyone else." He had sort of a sad little half-smile playing about his lips.

"Just about?" Booth asked. "Who did she not turn down?"

Beside him, with a stool to separate them, a dejected-looking blond man was practically sprawled on the bar with a tumbler of scotch and a cigarette in one hand and his head lying on the other. Without looking at them, he said "She turned down everyone that approached her. She knew she was hot, and she knew she could sing. She didn't want anyone that would throw themselves at her feet. She wanted a challenge." He sat up and took a drink.

"And you are?" Booth inquired.

"Sanji, chef for the Strawhat Pirates, and Serena reject," he replied in a depressed monotone.

Booth wrote down the man's name in the small notebook he kept in his pocket. "Right. And what type of guy did she go for?" he asked.

"Powerful," Sanji said. "Both physically and...monetarily, but not always both."

Naruto nodded. "The last guy she was with looked like a fighter of some sort. Big guy. He's over there in the corner." He pointed to the corner across the room on the same side as the entrance. "Always sits there, always orders a shot o' Jack and a rum and coke. About every other Saturday he orders two shots, but that's the only variation."

"Alright, thanks for your cooperation," Booth told the bartender. "Be prepared to see us again." Naruto nodded and went back to his glass-wiping, only now he was less happy about it.

Booth looked at his partner. "Come on, Bones. We'll leave him for now. He's a regular, so it's not like we can't just come back tomorrow." They turned to leave when a strange man that looked like Zac Efron with his white shirt, red tie, and brown hair, screamed.

"I KILLED HER! I KILLED SAILOR MOON!" he screamed at the top of his lungs while running toward them. Bones sidestepped him and punched him in the gut, knocking the air out of him. Booth cuffed him and signaled Scotty. "Beam us up, Scotty, we got one in cuffs."

Back on the Jeffersonian, Booth led the guy to a holding cell. When Dr. Brennan complained that they didn't have any evidence, Booth told her "He confessed. Whether or not he did it is irrelevant. I have to arrest him and interrogate him. We'll continue the investigation if it turns out he's just crazy." This seemed to mollify Dr. Brennan.

* * *

A/N2: If you didn't get that the guy that looked like Zac Efron was Light from Death Note, that's ok. I didn't really expect you to. That's next chapter. :)


End file.
